What choice to make.

I have a choice to make right now in my life.  Do I do the good thing or do I let that little devil out in me and be mean.  As I sit here writing I want so badly to post mean/truthful things about another person who was in my life.  Yet, the good little Mormon girl in me knows its wrong and I should not.  I sit here thinking well if I ever get called into a position where my past will be looked at and reviewed do I want this situation out there for someone to look at and say look at these bad choices she has made.  She is not a good person and does not deserve this good thing in her life.

Right now its so hard for me to not be mean and hurtful to these people.  They just keep saying such mean and hateful things to me and then I responded with my defenses and am mean back.  I am a better person than this or at least that is what I thought about myself.  I thought I knew how to act in life and not act like a 16 year old.  Yet, right now the choices I am making in regards to this family are not the best ones to make.  I need to stop reacting out of hurt and anger.  I need to turn the other cheek and just love them.  How do I do that.  How do you love people who continue to say such mean and hurtful things to you and about you.  How do you turn the other cheek with these people.  Right now I need God's help to give me the power to just be Christ like.  I don't know how to do it and right now am not even sure I am able to.  All I know is that I have to some how.  Its not about being the better person or even being better than them. Its about doing what I know in my heart to be the right thing.  To make that choice as hard as it is to turn the other cheek.  To just have Christlike love for this family.

To the people who wish to snoop into my life and assume things.  Please stop, your helping to cause hurtful feelings.  Your assuming and getting into something you don't really know anything about, is causing the situation to be worse.  Please stop you have won if that is what your after. I am broken and hurting very much.  Please think twice about what you think and relay to others.  Your causing people to hurt who do not deserve it. Please just stop. Thank you.