Today I woke up and I just felt like what the crap am I doing? I mean seriously let go. He is not coming back. Even if he did do I really want to live in such a small town where everyone knows you business. Where you don't have any privacy. Then my other thought was I have a great guy in my life who I have been dating. I haven't been really fair to him or our relationship cause of not letting go. He is here and likes me. He wants to be with me and thinks I am wonderful. I haven't figured out why he does but he does. I have kept him at bay partly due to still healing, and not wanting to get hurt once more. Yet in relationships you get hurt. No one is perfect and pain happens. It takes work and effort to make a relationship with anyone good. This guy wants to work at it with me. He keeps coming back even when I have tried to push him away. So today I decided to let things just go with him. To stop worrying about the pain and hurt. To just enjoy dating him. He might end up just being the rebound from D. Who knows. I may never marry once more, or get to have more children. Those are things that I can't answer right now. I will do my part and if God grants me the chance to marry another then I will. If not I will enjoy the life I have and the joys I get to experience in it.
Lastly thank you D for caring about me. For being there for me when I needed to learn that I could love another. Thank you for allowing me to learn that I am able to love another completely and whole. That I am wanted by another. That there are going to be others in my life who will want to be with me for me. That I have things to offer even though I have issues. I loved being loved by you and in love with you. I treasure my time with you. I learn many things about myself and about life. Thank you for trying so long and hard with me. Thank you for being you. Your are such a wonderful man. You are an amazing father. A very hard worker, dependable, and a good friend. Thank you for everything. I mean that really. Thank you
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment