So everyone who reads this knows I am a young widow. That off and on throughout my 4 years I have thoughts about getting married, falling in love once more, and living the rest of my earthly life in haven until I can be with Dayna once more. Well see the problem is that I am so lonely, and wanting more out of my life for the next 50+ years that I can get lost in words without actions. Now if your my friend Steven you will be telling me man your jumping the gun here give the boy sometime. True I could be jumping the gun, yet I don't believe I truly am. Now the situation that I am in is mostly my fault. I let my guard down. My want to be wanted and loved, once more far out played my smarts in my head. There is this boy and I really am interested in him. When talking with him he seems to have many of the things I am looking for. Strong in the church, mission, married in the temple, hold current recommend, widowed, wants more children, and feels it time to start dating once more.
So we chatted online, he asked for a photo, I sent him one (oh ya we met through lds mingle). He told me "OMG your cute!". I laughed said thank you and went on with the conversation. He asked if I had skype, I said no but could learn it if he would be patient while I learned. So after the first chat I went on and added a Skype account, I e-mailed it to him and he e-mailed back. He said "I got in late can we do it tomorrow." Well tomorrow would not work for me cause I had things to do. Two days later he added me to Skype but still nothing. Then Monday I got an e-mail asking me to set up a Skype time to chat. So we worked out a time and that night chatted. We talked away. Through out the conversation he told me how cute I was, how attracted he was to me, and how interested he was in me. So then we e-mailed and I told him I was thinking about him, he told me he was had been thinking about me all day long. Now in the course of this he told me we would go out when he got back in town next. That was to be Wednesday. Well then nothing. NO call, no follow through, no anything. Ya I tried to make him seem nice and said he contacted me and would make it up to me. Yet, in truth nothing, he hasn't contacted me since Tuesday. The dumb thing is that I learned I wanted to believe him, I wanted him to truly be interested in me and it not be just a line of crap. Now true he is a US air Marshal and busy but you would think if he truly was interested he would answer my e-mail, text, or call something. Yet, nothing not a thing from him. So I am giving up. I say it was just a line to see how fair I would take it and to help him not feel lonely those few nights. Could I be wrong? Sure but do I think that I am? NO. So I am giving up Steven once more and just going to focus on getting a job WHERE EVER I can get one, no matter the state (well within reason). So now you know my mistake. I wanted to be wanted so much that I believe a line of crap. That it was just about some lonely guy who needed attention those days and I gave it. I doubted him many times through out our conversations but he said he really was and it didn't make sense why I didn't believe him. Well I think he just was lonely and needed some attention from a girl and I fit the bill. Anyways lesson learned and goodnight.
So we chatted online, he asked for a photo, I sent him one (oh ya we met through lds mingle). He told me "OMG your cute!". I laughed said thank you and went on with the conversation. He asked if I had skype, I said no but could learn it if he would be patient while I learned. So after the first chat I went on and added a Skype account, I e-mailed it to him and he e-mailed back. He said "I got in late can we do it tomorrow." Well tomorrow would not work for me cause I had things to do. Two days later he added me to Skype but still nothing. Then Monday I got an e-mail asking me to set up a Skype time to chat. So we worked out a time and that night chatted. We talked away. Through out the conversation he told me how cute I was, how attracted he was to me, and how interested he was in me. So then we e-mailed and I told him I was thinking about him, he told me he was had been thinking about me all day long. Now in the course of this he told me we would go out when he got back in town next. That was to be Wednesday. Well then nothing. NO call, no follow through, no anything. Ya I tried to make him seem nice and said he contacted me and would make it up to me. Yet, in truth nothing, he hasn't contacted me since Tuesday. The dumb thing is that I learned I wanted to believe him, I wanted him to truly be interested in me and it not be just a line of crap. Now true he is a US air Marshal and busy but you would think if he truly was interested he would answer my e-mail, text, or call something. Yet, nothing not a thing from him. So I am giving up. I say it was just a line to see how fair I would take it and to help him not feel lonely those few nights. Could I be wrong? Sure but do I think that I am? NO. So I am giving up Steven once more and just going to focus on getting a job WHERE EVER I can get one, no matter the state (well within reason). So now you know my mistake. I wanted to be wanted so much that I believe a line of crap. That it was just about some lonely guy who needed attention those days and I gave it. I doubted him many times through out our conversations but he said he really was and it didn't make sense why I didn't believe him. Well I think he just was lonely and needed some attention from a girl and I fit the bill. Anyways lesson learned and goodnight.
I'm so sorry Terri. I would be so frustrated if I were you. I don't think it's too early to move on. I think you deserve to find a wonderful, honest and loving man.
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